Yesterday was a very sad but good day. We lost our cousin, Connie Sue Kelley, age 71, to a 6.5 wk bout of cancer. 6.5 weeks! What a short time for the family to adjust to a terminal illness, fit in last visits and say goodbye forever here on this earth!
Connie was a very fun-loving, life-loving person. We all recall different anecdotes, but almost every single one of them is humorous. I vividly remember her telling me when she got to Heaven she was going to jump from cloud to cloud. None of my older siblings remembered this, so I thought maybe it was just something she told me. Then at the funeral yesterday, as her pastor shared various memories from the family, that was something one of the grandkids mentioned. I know I was about 8 or 9 when she told me that, so it must have been a concept she shared with children.
When we stepped in the church, my husband, sister, brother and I were immediately engulfed in hugs from all seven children. We shared an unusual bond with our fourth cousins. Their parents, our parents and our mom’s brother and wife were all saved within a few months of each other. They were the only three young couples in the church and they spent many hours together each week “studying their Bibles and eatin’ Freddie’s donuts.” I don’t remember those days because I wasn’t born yet, but I’ve heard the stories numerous times. And because of this bond, we are closer to these fourth cousins than we are to our first cousins.
The funeral service was perfect and that is why I said in my opening statement that yesterday was a sad but good day. I don’t think anything could have been done to make the service better. I have tried to compile the events as I remember them, but some may be out of order.
· Opening remarks – Rev. Paul Martin
· PowerPoint Presentation – John’s and Connie’s favorite love song accompanied by pictures of the two of them
· The Family Remembers Connie - as told to Pastor Martin
· Recorded reading written by granddaughter, Shana (daughter of Mark and Cindy) – she did a fabulous job and concluded with the comment that God took Grandma because he knew that she worked hard here on earth and needed to rest
· “Wings to Fly” – song by Mark, Scott, Sheri and Jesse (they did great and kept their composure well! I was impressed.)
· Comments about Connie’s character by Pastor Martin – she enjoyed humor; she was a giving person - kept a job simply so she could give gifts and money away; made sure her kids, grandkids and in-laws always had cards on birthdays, Easter and Valentine’s Day; gave gifts to the pastor’s family at Christmas because she always appreciated people remembering their family when they were in the pastorate; she thought she didn’t impact many people but Pastor Martin had those in the congregation stand who had received money or a gift from Connie at one time or another…it was a show of those whom she did influence with her giving spirit; she always asked for the hardest job at camp clean-up or such days because she knew no one else would want that job-what an awesome legacy she left.
· “Leave Me a Message” – a heart-wrenching song by daughter-in-law, Michele (wife to Jesse) and more photos of John and Connie. The song is from a husband’s perspective at his wife’s funeral. He asks
At the committal, after the words, prayer and song by the pastor, the funeral director shared a couple thoughts. He mentioned that a few years ago Connie had him come out to their home to make funeral arrangements…she didn’t want to burden the kids. He said that within 3 or 4 minutes after meeting her, he felt he was her friend and all the things that the pastor had shared were indeed true. He would see her around town here and there and each time she saw him she would say, “I’m not ready yet!” Any of us that knew Connie, can hear it and laugh because it sounds just like her.
He then told us that if you look in the dictionary, casket does not mean box for burial. It means hope chest. So he encouraged each mourner to touch the casket and leave our fingerprints or handprints in hope until the resurrection.
At the close of the committal service, the grand kids gathered in a circle and were given white balloons. Pastor Martin prayed a short prayer and when he said “amen” the balloons were released signifying the releasing of Grandma to God.
We’ll miss you, Connie! Your laughter, humor and wit. Your “nerdy” moments that made us chuckle. But most of all, your caring spirit that made it seem perfectly natural for a family with two little girls and one on the way to call you one summer night and see if you could come baby-sit while the mommy went to the hospital because she was so ill. We knew the girls were in good hands so there was no worry or concern while we were dealing with life 30 miles away. The thing I find most amazing about that night was that while Britnee and Janae hardly knew you, they did not seem uneasy to be left in your care. Of course, I’m sure it had something to do with the bag of goodies you brought (how could you know that Janae loved Barney and that was all she needed to take her mind off Mommy’s absence?) But it was also obvious that you had experience working with children. I don’t know if I ever thanked you for doing that for us when we had no immediate family around to help us. I can only hope to live by your example.
Barb and I imagine you up there cuddling our ten babies that we have lost to miscarriage. Give them a kiss and hug for us and tell them someday we’ll see you all in Heaven!
Connie was a very fun-loving, life-loving person. We all recall different anecdotes, but almost every single one of them is humorous. I vividly remember her telling me when she got to Heaven she was going to jump from cloud to cloud. None of my older siblings remembered this, so I thought maybe it was just something she told me. Then at the funeral yesterday, as her pastor shared various memories from the family, that was something one of the grandkids mentioned. I know I was about 8 or 9 when she told me that, so it must have been a concept she shared with children.
When we stepped in the church, my husband, sister, brother and I were immediately engulfed in hugs from all seven children. We shared an unusual bond with our fourth cousins. Their parents, our parents and our mom’s brother and wife were all saved within a few months of each other. They were the only three young couples in the church and they spent many hours together each week “studying their Bibles and eatin’ Freddie’s donuts.” I don’t remember those days because I wasn’t born yet, but I’ve heard the stories numerous times. And because of this bond, we are closer to these fourth cousins than we are to our first cousins.
The funeral service was perfect and that is why I said in my opening statement that yesterday was a sad but good day. I don’t think anything could have been done to make the service better. I have tried to compile the events as I remember them, but some may be out of order.
· Opening remarks – Rev. Paul Martin
· PowerPoint Presentation – John’s and Connie’s favorite love song accompanied by pictures of the two of them
· The Family Remembers Connie - as told to Pastor Martin
· Recorded reading written by granddaughter, Shana (daughter of Mark and Cindy) – she did a fabulous job and concluded with the comment that God took Grandma because he knew that she worked hard here on earth and needed to rest
· “Wings to Fly” – song by Mark, Scott, Sheri and Jesse (they did great and kept their composure well! I was impressed.)
· Comments about Connie’s character by Pastor Martin – she enjoyed humor; she was a giving person - kept a job simply so she could give gifts and money away; made sure her kids, grandkids and in-laws always had cards on birthdays, Easter and Valentine’s Day; gave gifts to the pastor’s family at Christmas because she always appreciated people remembering their family when they were in the pastorate; she thought she didn’t impact many people but Pastor Martin had those in the congregation stand who had received money or a gift from Connie at one time or another…it was a show of those whom she did influence with her giving spirit; she always asked for the hardest job at camp clean-up or such days because she knew no one else would want that job-what an awesome legacy she left.
· “Leave Me a Message” – a heart-wrenching song by daughter-in-law, Michele (wife to Jesse) and more photos of John and Connie. The song is from a husband’s perspective at his wife’s funeral. He asks
At the committal, after the words, prayer and song by the pastor, the funeral director shared a couple thoughts. He mentioned that a few years ago Connie had him come out to their home to make funeral arrangements…she didn’t want to burden the kids. He said that within 3 or 4 minutes after meeting her, he felt he was her friend and all the things that the pastor had shared were indeed true. He would see her around town here and there and each time she saw him she would say, “I’m not ready yet!” Any of us that knew Connie, can hear it and laugh because it sounds just like her.
He then told us that if you look in the dictionary, casket does not mean box for burial. It means hope chest. So he encouraged each mourner to touch the casket and leave our fingerprints or handprints in hope until the resurrection.
At the close of the committal service, the grand kids gathered in a circle and were given white balloons. Pastor Martin prayed a short prayer and when he said “amen” the balloons were released signifying the releasing of Grandma to God.
We’ll miss you, Connie! Your laughter, humor and wit. Your “nerdy” moments that made us chuckle. But most of all, your caring spirit that made it seem perfectly natural for a family with two little girls and one on the way to call you one summer night and see if you could come baby-sit while the mommy went to the hospital because she was so ill. We knew the girls were in good hands so there was no worry or concern while we were dealing with life 30 miles away. The thing I find most amazing about that night was that while Britnee and Janae hardly knew you, they did not seem uneasy to be left in your care. Of course, I’m sure it had something to do with the bag of goodies you brought (how could you know that Janae loved Barney and that was all she needed to take her mind off Mommy’s absence?) But it was also obvious that you had experience working with children. I don’t know if I ever thanked you for doing that for us when we had no immediate family around to help us. I can only hope to live by your example.
Barb and I imagine you up there cuddling our ten babies that we have lost to miscarriage. Give them a kiss and hug for us and tell them someday we’ll see you all in Heaven!
3 comments:
Wow that would be something and what a tribute!!
I have never heard of the casket being called that but how neat.
Also the white balloons was a great idea.
I understand when you say it was perfect.
Thanks for sharing.
Sorry for all the heartache you are going through.
Someone told me that it will make a person stronger.
God Bless you Sara.
Love & Prayers, Sharon
She sounds like the kind of woman who makes you long for heaven just a little more.
Beautiful legacy!
Janice
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